Peace Pipe Ditty - Pete Wagner - Copyright 2003 Pete Wagner Well it was coming down to war, as both sides were pointing guns And I was just thinking, like I do, 'bout the fate of the little ones And how the good folks'll end up dead while the rich'll just end up richer And it sure don't take a genius to see that something's fucked up with this picture So I worked out a little plan of sorts I think it's worth a shot Of course there's no way of knowing, never is, whether it'd work or not See we gotta get our so-called leaders to see past their strategies of destruction To somehow reorient their greedy little thoughts toward a more peaceful function So I took a big hit, and then it hit me back There's just one thing that I know those fuckers lack It's a peace pipe packed with the finest shit in town Where they could take a hit and just pass the shit around If you smoke the shit I smoke you know it all makes perfect sense You'd have the Prez himself, the VP and the Secretaries of State and Defense They'd be meeting at the big round table, with smoke rising up through the vents Until the presidential bogart and "this meeting's adjourned gents, I mean dudes" They would get all warm and fuzzy with a big old silly grin And just sit back and watch TV and laugh at all their own spin Then they would eat pepperoni pizza till the grease runs down their chin And they might just have a guilty thought about this war they wanta get us in So another hit, it hits me back again Heck, there could even be a resolution at the U.N. And they'd sanction only those who don't inhale And should tensions rise, well just break out another bail Then you could capture all their attention with just a VCR Play Blues Brothers, pouring shots everytime they'd wreck a car Then after ice cream you'd take 'em all out to the karioke bar Then call it a night when you find the distance to the stage to far Soon they wouldn't have a care about no weapons stash Hell they'd use their own weapons to hide all those cans of corned beef hash We'd all have these pot tokens, see, and you wouldn't even need no cash Then the only war we'd ever know would be from reruns of MASH So one more hit, one more toke Draw it in slowly, holding in the smoke Yeah you might cough a little at first, but you'll never choke And you'll never wanta fight a war and you'll always get the joke But who am I kidding, those assholes are probably all on speed They'd be smokin' crack before they'd ever mellow out with weed They'd sooner send us straight to hell at execution speed Then to realize that they're all just really friends in need So when you watch em sell their war, well don't be surprised We all oughta know by now, it's just a pack of lies But it may just all work out, to spell their political demise And maybe then a more aromatic smoke will fill the skies So one more hit, on the old peace pipe Um, are you gonna finish that there bowl of tripe Well you weren't before but now I think you're just my type So take another hit, no this won't hurt a bit, And yeah this is pretty good shit in the old peace pipe ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~