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r.i.p. 1997 - extracts from confusion news
Seems like one of the previous South African regime's ministers is applying
for amnesty having been implicated in the bombing of a church and the
organisation of death squads. Pathetic! I reckon they should take the time to
find out about REAL Law and Order. Here in England for example, where about
thirty single mothers on welfare benefits are now in prison 'coz they
were caught watching television without a licence - Britain's Greatness
isn't just the result of wealth gained from slave-trading y'know.
getting off lightly
And talking of prison, what's all the fuss over the three
surviving members of the Bridgwater Four, convicted on the evidence
of "confessions" forged by the police, and now being released after serving
eighteen years of a sentence for a crime they didn't commit...
there's animals in UK zoos that've been behind bars for TWICE that
long WITHOUT HAVING EVER BEEN TRIED, LET ALONE CONVICTED!!!
whipping up support
Commenting on the release of their election manifesto, the leader of
the UK Independence Party claimed that were their policies to be adopted
Britain would "once again become a world-beater". Given its colonial history,
one can only conclude that this is a direct appeal to the S&M vote.
for their own good
The sad loss of David Evans from the House of Commons is a bitter blow
to all of us fighting for a decent moral society. Who now will take up
his courageous proposal for the introduction into the UK of a system of
zero tolerance for drug abusers? And who will further his desire to
advocate the death penalty for all those in possession of drugs?
(Anyone objecting on the grounds of problems re the disposing of the
estimated 6,000,000 corpses should of course be reminded that there are
...sauce for the gander?
Meanwhile, the admission by the Secretary General of Interpol that
"we are losing the
battle on drugs" might well create a shiver of fear in those responsible
for interning the valiant enemy troops. Will not the victors want
retribution? Soon it may be the turn of senior politicians policemen and
prison officers to wake to the violent knock in the middle of the night,
followed by splintering sounds as the door is smashed down and hordes of
heavily armed Drug Enforcement Agents storm in, ransack their homes,
manhandle them from their beds, arrest them for not being in possession of
any proscribed substances, and carry them off to the cells for interrogation
know your enemy
Ironic, isn't it? Armies of gallant soldiers despatched thousands of miles
into the middle of a desert to try and sort out a territorial squabble
between the local despots over yet another of Britain's biased colonial
adjudications; once there getting warned about the danger of being gassed
with deadly chemicals by the evil enemy hordes; and then unthinkingly
obeying orders to pour organo-phosphates all over themselves.
going for bronze
Not that the fate of a few thousand British soldiers is likely to be
of much interest to the Iraqis.
As long ago as December 1995, the UN Food and Agriculture Organisation
reported that 576,000 children had died as a result of sanctions against
Iraq and the freezing of its overseas assets.
Now the UN News announces that the total number of
deaths equals those killed by the Pol Pot regime.
Even allowing for enthusiastic exaggeration it
seems that we're well on course for the next target: surpassing those wiped
out by the Holocaust. [Feb '98 update: UN figures for latest total of
deaths resulting from sanctions is 1.5M.]
What a pity that the population of Iraq is too
small and the time left insufficient, to threaten the totals set during
China's Cultural Revolution and the Russian program of purges and population
redistribution. Still, if everyone sticks to their guns, a top 20 place in
Genocides of the Century now looks assured
despite some late competition from Bosnia, Algeria, Rwanda etc.
and everyone lived happily ever after
With the proposed abolition of Blood Sports and the resultant loss of jobs,
mass starvation is said to be looming for hundreds of thousands of loyal
workers who have faithfully served their masters and mistresses for
There is only one solution. The horses must be fed to the hounds and the
bloated hounds then sold to China, where they are considered to
be something of a delicacy. The capital raised can then be invested to
provide for the emergency employment of a couple of dozen gamekeepers
should the country's future become endangered by the periodic fluctuations
of the fox and hare populations.
As for everyone previously dependent on the Hunt and the Chase, they will
no longer have anything to do, so the reduction in overheads
(equipment, tools, uniforms, weapons etc)
should be more than enough to give them a healthy wage rise.
And those previously struggling to keep their kennels and stables
from falling into ruin will suddenly find themselves rich beyond their
wildest dreams, such will be the savings in dog-food, which because of
the continued culling of Britain's beef herds looks like becoming
increasingly difficult to get hold of anyway.
please note: opinions expressed in confusion news are not
necessarily those held by the Government of Great Britain and Northern
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